Archive for Allen West

Palin recommends Romney go West!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on April 4, 2012 by conservativewerewolf

Alaska Woman and I think alike.


Dear Allen West: Continue Being Awesome.

Posted in 2012 Election with tags , on January 29, 2012 by conservativewerewolf

Representative West:

I understand you’ve had some reservations about running for president.  You’re a new rep and you’ve been busy learning your way around D.C., and we haven’t had a chance to talk about it one-on-one, but after viewing this video, I just want to let you know that it’s okay with me.  Obviously, you weren’t sure how such an important minority would react to your candidacy, and you couldn’t take a poll, because we’re kinda underground

...So, you HAVE heard of that and all.  I get it.  That’s why I wanted to take this moment to let you know that the Conservative Werewolf fully supports your now imminent run for president, and eagerly anticipates the unavoidable and so very deserved beatdown you’ll give the Romster and Gingy.  (I would ask you not to make Santorum cry, but I think just being in the presence of so much manliness would kick start his tear ducts.)  As for Ron, well, that’ll be an interesting debate (finally).

So, you have my blessing!  Go to it!


The Conservative Werewolf

Marines desecrate Taliban corpses!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on January 13, 2012 by conservativewerewolf

I won’t tell you what I envisioned when I read that headline, but it was so bad that when I read that they merely peed on them, I laughed because it was so mild compared to what I’d been prepared for, and thought, “That’s it?”

It was inappropriate (such behavior should be BENEATH a U.S. marine), and STUPID because the images will be used to stoke America-hatred.  But geez, was it that bad?

As usual, Allen West says it best:

“I have sat back and assessed the incident with the video of our Marines urinating on Taliban corpses. I do not recall any self-righteous indignation when our Delta snipers Shugart and Gordon had their bodies dragged through Mogadishu. Neither do I recall media outrage and condemnation of our Blackwater security contractors being killed, their bodies burned, and hung from a bridge in Fallujah.

“All these over-emotional pundits and armchair quarterbacks need to chill. Does anyone remember the two Soldiers from the 101st Airborne Division who were beheaded and gutted in Iraq?

“The Marines were wrong. Give them a maximum punishment under field grade level Article 15 (non-judicial punishment), place a General Officer level letter of reprimand in their personnel file, and have them in full dress uniform stand before their Battalion, each personally apologize to God, Country, and Corps videotaped and conclude by singing the full US Marine Corps Hymn without a teleprompter.

“As for everyone else, unless you have been shot at by the Taliban, shut your mouth, war is hell.”

And there you have it: a reasonable response.


Eat it, Holder

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on November 15, 2011 by conservativewerewolf

Hey Biden, want to see an African-American who’s “articulate and bright and clean and nice-looking”?

Southern black man Allen West, who resides on no one’s plantation, calls out Eric Holder for his America-hatingness and fatal (for other people) stupidity – otherwise known as Operation Fast and Furious.  Because it was like those car movies.  Like, super cool and shit.  Except, it wasn’t.

You know how you’re not exactly sure what a werewolf  looks  like, but when you see one, you know it? Like, you have a basic idea (furry, with teeth), but you’re not sure of how it’s all put together because you see werewolves so infrequently? Same thing with Allen West’s ballsy manliness.

Will Holder actually resign?  Or, as the question should be, will he be thrown under the bus as Van Jones and Anita Dunn were?  Because, if not, he’ll probably stay because there are too many pussy-footing Republicans who won’t stand up and say the obvious: “That was really really really stupid.  You need to go home now.”

Or maybe I’m wrong.  Maybe every Republican will sign letters asking for his resignation.  So go on, guys – prove me wrong.

I can haz fawr President Allen West plz???

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on July 27, 2011 by conservativewerewolf

I can not haz (in 2012).  But I can dream.

Interviewer: Would you, if you could, withdraw any of the language, or, the words that you used?

Allen West: No, I wouldn’t.

Boo yah.

Conservative Werewolf has no patience for whiny little girls, and neither, it seems, does  Allen West.

Quick recap:

Allen: [leaves the room]

Debbie: Allen West wants to take Medicare away from his constituents!

Allen: [types] Bring it.

Debbie: Look at the mean email, everyone!  I mean, not like I am fazed, but still, LOOK.

Femigeese: [flock around little girl Debbie, who apparently needs protection from the big bad scary manly man, being that he is something more than the snot-nosed rat-like male turtles they are used to – seriously, what the heck is up with the woman-assaulting congressman in a tiger suit?  Feminists, your thoughts?  Feminists?  ABC News?  Anyone?]


Congressman Allen West Comments on President Obama

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on June 21, 2011 by conservativewerewolf

West is an all-right human.

Watching this video, wherein he comments on President Obama (the kind of human who, were he a zebra, would already have been munched*), is a bit like being scratched behind the ears.


*Not that I would munch a zebra**.  Or the president.  Just sayin’.

**At least not one that hadn’t been properly cleaned and grilled.  Wonder if A-1 is good on zebra…